 Humpday Lust Pit
Phew! I've finally escaped the devious, illicit enchantment with which Deus Ex ensnared me. I can actually look around and enjoy the world around me for a few hours... [read more...]
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 Who Wants to Be a Millionaire
Last summer, millions of rabid television watchers tuned in each night to ABC to watch Regis Philbin grind pointless trivia out of complete losers and utter... [read more...]
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 Blair Witch RP: Screenshots and Death
Mr. Tea, #5 in June 2000
eUniverse is reporting that three new screen shots of their upcoming title, The Blair Witch Volume 1: Rustin Parr, are up on their site and ready for our viewing pleasure. According to eUniverse, the Blair Witch-based game will be an action/adventure game that will frighten and amaze you. Terminal Reality, the developer, recently sent this press release solely to me:
We wanted a creative game, and we wanted one badly. The only way to do this was to send our development team out into the woods to find their creativity and to hone it.
(What follows is their journal...)
Day One: Half the team is already dead. Jon, our lead programmer, had the munchies and decided to try out this new "creativity" thing. He said he saw a movie where people who were stranded ate members of their party, and he suggested that we do the same. It sounded "creative" at the time, but now we think it may have been a mistake. Besides, we had three coolers full of sandwiches. I guess we just let "creativity" get the best of us.
Day Two: It is now apparent that this "creativity" is an evil, evil thing. After yesterdayâs debacle, Jon "creatively" hung himself from a tree. Project Quality Manager, Sarah, decided that we scrap the "creativity" thing and just follow the creek to civilization. We had a better, and need I say, more "creative" idea. We were going to follow the squirrel. No one had ever done anything this "creative", but after several hours of following the squirrel, we are now deep in the woods and we hear noises all around us. It sounds a lot like a drunken John Romero screaming about Daikatana, but we canât be sure. It may-
(The journal ended there.)
We have learned an important lesson from this journal: creativity is dangerous. In order to prevent the threat of creativity from spreading we are making a Blair Witch game, just like everyone else. It is the most uncreative thing we could think of. Youâll thank us later.
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